{"product_id":"i-may-not-be-able-to-bury-my-tongue","title":"I May Not Be Able to Bury My Tongue.","description":"\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width:360px;\"\u003e\n            \u003cthead\u003e\n                \u003ctr\u003e\n                    \u003cth style=\"padding:10px;\"\u003e\u003c\/th\u003e\n                    \u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e4XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e5XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n                \u003c\/tr\u003e\n            \u003c\/thead\u003e\n            \u003ctbody\u003e\n                \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Width, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            18.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            20.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            22.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            24.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            26.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            28.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            30.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            32.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Length, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            28.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            29.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            30.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            31.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            32.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            33.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            34.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            35.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Sleeve length (from center back), in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            15.10 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            16.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            18.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            19.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            21.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            22.40 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            23.70 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            25.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Size tolerance, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.50 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n            \u003c\/tbody\u003e\n        \u003c\/table\u003e\n        A clean, bold statement tee that speaks in short, darkly witty lines. This classic crew-neck shirt carries a centered, typewriter-like text across the chest, delivering a tongue-in-cheek, slightly macabre message with quiet confidence. Wear it with faded jeans, layered under a worn jacket, or alone to let the words do the talking. The soft, sturdy cotton feels familiar from the first wear and settles into the wardrobe as a go-to for late-night gigs, coffee runs, or when you want to lean into a wry sense of humor. It’s for people who appreciate sharp, literary humor and subtle shock value—those who prefer to spark a double-take rather than shout for attention.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- Medium-weight 100% cotton fabric (5.3 oz\/yd²) for everyday durability and comfort\u003cbr\u003e- Tubular knit, seamless sides for reduced waste and a smooth silhouette\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed knit collar and shoulder tape to maintain shape and prevent stretching\u003cbr\u003e- Dual printing: DTF for sleeves\/labels and DTG for main chest design for crisp detail\u003cbr\u003e- Tear-away label, Oeko-Tex certified, made in Nicaragua with ethical US cotton sourcing\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed\u003cbr\u003e- Do not iron\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Made in Nicaragua\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Gravel \/ S","offer_id":47770360938750,"sku":"18783586287918196498","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":47770360971518,"sku":"20130029069434675053","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 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3XL","offer_id":47770361692414,"sku":"21653237713761461616","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gravel \/ 4XL","offer_id":47770361725182,"sku":"20274833535777173850","price":22.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":47770361757950,"sku":"24258592126933316369","price":22.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":47770361790718,"sku":"19427862294431631823","price":22.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 4XL","offer_id":47770361823486,"sku":"76092716519436366066","price":22.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gravel \/ 5XL","offer_id":47770361856254,"sku":"13859347725319175440","price":22.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 5XL","offer_id":47770361889022,"sku":"16852660887292339665","price":22.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 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